Tuesday, October 03, 2006

Movies on TV this week

Watched a bunch of movies this week. Most of them that i had watched earlier, and some new ones as well...

Muddula Koduku

Man, there he is again. Doing what he is best at, acting the role of the loser who redeems himself at the end. What is with Ravi Shankar that he tries to enact the role of Sad man with inferiority complex/Hero with grey shades/Loser/Fag(Sorry!! heh heh!) every time around.

This time he reprises his role as Quasimodo again. Ravi Shankar is the responsible, dutiful son of Revathy who live in the same colony as Gopika. He takes up the burden of the family after his father dies in his childhood. With his helpful nature, he endears himself to people around and slowly forms a loyal coterie of well wishers.

He however has one major chip on his shoulder. One side of his face is badly burnt (yup, there go the inevitable references to Satyam Shivam Sundaram, Phantom of the Opera, Hunchback of Notre Dame....). Though he's got used to it and it doesnt matter to the people who truly care for him, he cant but ponder what life would be if things were better. How would it be if his face was normal again? What would it feel like to not have doubts, whether people really love you or just being sympathetic?

He decides to give plastic surgery a shot, and starts working round the clock to fund his dream. It goes to the point of an obsession, where he starts hurting people around him in his single minded quest. "Cant i have some happiness of my own? Dont i have the right to want what really makes me happy?" he starts bellowing when his mom asks for some extra money for his sister. He stops lending his friends money.

To lend more credence to his dreams, he develops an infatuation with a PYT (Vennela) at the Pizza place he works for. He never reveals his true face in front of her (wears a party mask around her) and starts hoping that he could reveal himself as her prince charming.

Events come to their usual finale, with Ravi realising the cliched "beauty is only skindeep; better to love the people who love you, blah blah blah".

Most of the movie was watchable. Some scenes give a sense of Deja Vu where Ravi tries his best to manipulate emotions. Some grouses though...

1, What is with the lead star trying to milk some tears everytime the discussion veers towards his face?
2. Dude, you make the pizza girl feel sorry...do you have to revel in make her cringe with guilt everytime she sees you?
3. And yes, what the heck was Prakash Raj and Gopika doing in lack luster roles.

And Ravi, u still top my list of all time losers in movies.

Anyway, worth a watch if you have nothing else to do.


BOYS

Yeah baby!! I must have seen this movie a bunch of times in the last 2 months and this still works for me. Whether it be the acting of Genelia, Siddarth, Bharat or the excellent music of A.R Rahman this one is still watchable. Some scenes feel overtly stale and useless by now, but hey it still rocks.



Swades

The lesser said about this movie, the better. Not bcoz its bad, but a small review wouldnt do justice to this masterpiece which is one of my all time favorites. Seldom does a movie come that lingers in the back of your mind for days together. Mohan Bhargava must be a role that SRK can be really proud of than the "hams"ter gooey roles he does.

The scenes where he goes to collect rent on Kaveri-Amma's behalf and the aftermath are the most haunting of the lot.

The scene where he has a confrontation with the village elders about their hyprocritcal stance is an immensely watchable one.

Bought the DVD after watching it on DD National.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

Gunny Bag (Alternative Ending Teaser)- by Smruti


His hands enveloped the marble which he always carried around… it was special… it was a gift from Harry. That one time, when he had beaten Harry, the master of ‘kanchas’, Harry had let him keep the marble cue. He remembered the game with a smile; he had felt on top of the world. He had celebrated his win by having ice candies with Ginny at the park. How happy Ginny was for him. But then Harry and gang had turned up and started teasing Ginny. How he had watched helplessly when all that he wanted was to enjoy the moment of victory with Ginny and his ice candy. But then, he had been floating in seventh heaven, and had been a mute spectator not lifting a finger to help Ginny.
Then it was all routine, he playing the mute spectator in Ginny’s humiliation. The recollection of those days flashed across his mind like a fast moving western, in Technicolor. There was Ginny being ridiculed over her baggy trousers two sizes big while there was him with a half smile. Next was Ginny being ridiculed for not being able to catch the ball during a cricket match, Ginny being poked in the ribs for laughing at Harry when he ‘accidentally’ slipped down in the mud. And there was he, standing in the corner, with a half smile, not knowing whethser to join in the vicious laughter or telling Harry to leave the poor girl alone. The vivid image made him tighten his grip on the marble. He felt miserable. He was so distraught that he almost flung the marble away into the sea.
But wait a sec, what was he doing, hadn’t he felt like a king when he had won that kancha match, didn’t he feel good when he was with Harry and the gang. He felt as if he belonged somewhere. Hadn’t Magesh his cousin who was in senior school and in the basketball team told him that you had to be a team player and tough to survive in this mean, bad world. And if Ginny was not able to take Harry’s teasing in the right spirit, then tough luck. How would she manage when she grew up? And besides, he was not going to hang with her, a girl, all the time. It was not cool. Maggi (everybody called him Maggi, short for Magesh) never hung out the girls. He went to school, practiced in the evenings, hung around with his team and then came home. Just because, Ginny was his childhood friend didn’t mean anything; He hadn’t chose Ginny as his friend. They had been forced to be friends as their mom’s were friends.
He straightened up resolutely; he was going to get back to Harry and gang, the one place where he was accepted. They were his friends; he was not going to give them up so easily, not without a fight. But how was he going to do the impossible, Harry was never going to forgive him for defying him. Forget forgiving, he was not even talking to him. His shoulders slumped again. His whole world was crumbling around him.
He was jerked from his thoughts by a weird shuffling sound coming from behind the rocks. He was irritated, that his thoughts were being disturbed so. He shook his head and continued being miserable, when the shuffling turned into whispers. He couldn’t concentrate in wallowing in self pity any more. He decided to go and tell the lovers to keep it down. They had to be lover, only couples came to the beach to make out behind the rocks, it was a common sight in the busy metropolis.
However, what he saw wiped all thoughts of Ginny, Harry and the gang from his mind. He saw a scruffy looking fat man bending over a gunny bag while another man slightly older than fatso was sitting on a rock and looking extremely bored. He passed his time by arranging and re-arranging his numerous gold chains which could have amounted to the entire gold reserve of Uganda.
As the thoughts passed his mind in a rapid fire round, Gold-pot looked up and saw him. Gunny froze on the spot seeing the steely eyes of gold-pot. He found his legs as heavy as a steel almirah the kinds that Madhu aunty had in her house… the fraction of the second that it took him to realize that he has to run and the actual act of urging his legs to listen to him seemed like an eternity.
He ran like mad from that place, all thoughts of Harry and Ginny abandoned, all misery wiped out from his life… survival was the only thought.
Once he reached home, he went to his room without a glance at his sobbing mom or his dad who was watching TV as if that’s the most important thing in this world (sic).
He took a breath only after he reached his room and had locked the door and latched the window, checked under the bed incase gold-pot was hiding there. He was scared, but he didn’t want to admit it to himself even if he was alone. He fell asleep dreaming about the gunny bag and the two scary men and Ginny and mom and Harry and his marble...

Friday, September 15, 2006

Revenge of the "Leo"nine Nymph


A few months back, i actually had the chance to witness the shooting of a telugu movie called "Bommarilu". There was my god, Siddarth shooting with a pimply teenager heavily plied with makeup who seemed surprisingly subdued for an celeb.

'Man!! She sucks!", thought this shmuck. "I wonder why anyone would bother hiring this dame for a whopping 40 lacs. She doesnt seem to have any looks or charisma to carry it off..." thought this lame ass.

Circa, 8 months later:

Diary Entry:

Dear Diary,
Saw the movie "Boys" yesterday. Man, i was blown away by Harini. What an actress?!! Damn!! Too cute!!


Dear Diary,
Saw the movie Bommarilu yesterday. I am in love......



God, she is talented...

Monday, September 11, 2006

Surreal Days!!


Haven't slept in the last 46 hours (and counting). Endless cups of coffee and a yawning disorder for company.

Last weekend was a blur...Friday night was a movie marathon night, with early breakfast buffet at Celebrities.

I had a weirdometer rating 5.0 experience on Saturday. I guess it must have been the amount of caffeine i snuck in, coupled with sleeplessness. I was there watching the movie "Boys" and was left with a low feeling after finishing it. Yeah, the movie was bad, but that wasnt the only reason.

A couple of scenes seemed to evoke the memories of a "Blast from the Past" and it took me a long time to get over it. Life seems surreal sometimes. I seem to be having a nice time with my friends, and somehow stuff creeps in.

I better get some sleep.......

Thursday, September 07, 2006

Gunny bag's full!



Hi Yo' all!
I thought that was cool, but it sucks 'n' all!!!

To the perennial readers of this woesome blog, there are some updates. I have started another blog exclusively for movie reviews "cineophile.blogspot.com". So for people who wanna post more hate mail, pls direct it there!!

And, there was this idea i embarked upon one night. It was dark, very cold and i had a severe cold, but that nothing to do with the idea....

I went around asking (grovelling and begging) if anyone wanted to finish up the second part of my magnum O piss, Gunny Bag. To my surprise, there have been a bunch of people responding with their drafts. Interesting!!!

Keep watching this post for more news...

Cheerios Amigos!!

P.S: B.T.W, I think its time to change the name of this blog from pedestrian-writings to pseudo-writings soon!!

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

Atlas Shrugged? Im bugged!!


"The woods are dark and lonely, but i have miles to go before i sleep.."
" Time and tide dont wait for a damn ol' prick trying to get off his wagon..."

Man!!! Am i bored or what? Thousands of thoughts swirling around my head, 3 new imaginary friends this week, Fungus growin on my gro-in...em err heh heh..sorry!!

I am seriously bored and there aint enough work to keep me occupied. Times like these when u actually start evaluating the things uve left off a while back.

There was this dame in college who would say "Tyaaaarun, dude...u should start introspecting once in a while. Pretty good for u.."

Hmm...im done introspecting.

I think i need a new walk!

Friday, August 18, 2006

A day in the life of a Angst-Ridden Neurotic

8:00 AM: Wake up on the upper berth of a 3rd AC compartment. Give a brief dystopian "Uh? Who am i? Where am i? Am i alive? " look. Suddenly realise that the CEO is visiting office at 9 AM. Jump out of berth startling co-passengers. Still dont realise i look like shit.

8:05: Jostle angry co-passengers to get out of the coach. Scram to the nearest auto station outside the station.

8:06: Still running towards the auto stand in.............................the mother of all downpours!!!

8:07: Bargain with 1st auto driver ("what nonsense!!!i wont pay that much!)

8:07.30: Bargain with 2nd auto driver ("c'mon...it aint so far!!")

8:08: Bargain with 3rd auto driver (aaaaaaaaaargh!) (ok ok...just 10 rupees extra.)

8:09: Just get into 4th auto. (pada raa naayina!!...just step on it scumbag!!!)

8:14: Traffic Jam

8:25: Dumb kids on a speedo splash water inside rick, drenchin' me and bag thoroughly.

8:26: Curse thursdays

8:40: Reach home, throughly wet and mugged. Reach door and realise keys are missing!! (#%#$%$%%####)

8:45: Break open latch with watchman. Mental calculation of replacing lock...ummm..12+24+.... ummm

9:10: Reach office, no shave and extreme trepidation.

9:11: Realise CEO hasnt yet come. (mailto:sonofa$!$@#$#$$!!!!!)

9:12: Finish sales funnel review. Nothing to show!!

10:00: King arrives. Scrutinises me with contempt

11:00: First client meet

1:00: Second client meet

5 pm: 3rd "A*******" meeting

7pm-10pm: Review meeting (Will this day ever end?)

11pm: Back home finally

11:14: Walk into kitchen to make something. Start washing pile of dishes. Curse maid!!

11:16: Open refrigerator door for sneak peek. Find all stuff rotted. Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!!!! faint with the smell

11:25: Wake up. Start cleaning mess wearing mask. Ewwwwwwwwwwwww!!

11:30: Prepare measly dinner with remaining stuff.

1:00 am: Land into bed.

1:15am: Power cut

End of Day

Monday, July 03, 2006

Kkraaaaaap...........!!!


Venue: Star Studios, Mumbai
Time: 10 AM

Host: And the time you all have been waiting for, meet the duo that has redefined the rules of bollywood, ushered a new era in indian cinema, stretched the boundaries of imagination...(still reading from a cue card)....the baap-beta from el-dorado...the Roshansssssssss....they are here to bare their hearts out in the "first ever" personal interview

Papa Roshan (P.R-Indeed): Hi there everyone!! its nice to meet you. Where's that son of mine?!! Haan, there he is...beta, apna tie straighten karo....say hullo to the nice man interviewing here..

Beta Roshan (B.R): Yes Papa! Hullo.....um...huh...Sir!!

Host: So, Hrithik! You must be happy by the response for Kkrish.

B.R (In a low tone): ummm...paaaaaaaaaapa.

P.R: Haan beta bolo, subah se jo pad raha the, sunaaoh

B.R (Clear his throat, confidently): Yeah man!! im so cool about the whole thing....Kkrish was a wonderful movie, it was the first time SFX were used in such a way. Im happy for its success. It cost us 45 crores to make...

P.R: cough.....cough....50!!

B.R (looking apologetic): he he he...yeah yeah 50 crores (gulps)

Host: Coming to the promotions, there have been allegations that u plugged all the news channels to give 24X7 coverage of your movie alone. Dont they go against the ethics of news reporting?

Papa Roach: Absolutely not, that is a ridiculous allegation. I only asked NDTV, Zee, BBC,CNN, and some hindi channels to run our news items for some private screenings of our movie. Where does the question of ethics come in. Nonsense. BTW, did u know we hired Tony from Hong Kong to choreograph our stunts?? He is the very same guy who did the stunts for Hero!! Do you know?

Host: heh heh...we do watch the news Mr. Roshan. Anyways, there is the allegation that you exploit your son by using him in all your films and not paying him. Forgive me if i am intruding, Sir...but is this true?

B.R (Baap Rey!!) (Angry and shouting): That is insane! My dad isnt using me at all....and as for payment, he recently raised my weekly allowance. He is the best dad in the world. He now lets me stay up till 11 pm!! How dare you?!

P.R (Again): Beta, never lose your temper. When u become big, ull realise that u shouldnt behave like that in public. Now, show these people the new dance step u've been practising...

B.R (Shyly): Papaaaa....! Ok...if u say (jumps on his feet, starts singing and dancing)
"....Aao sunaooh pyaar ki ek kahaani..!!"

P.R: Deko hostji, he's grown tremendously as an actor. He is started heading out in other avenues now. He's very inquisitive to learn new things. In my new film, he is taking care of all the catering...

Host(With raised eyebrows): No doubt about that! So, Hrithik, you seem to have made quite an impression on the youngsters. They perceive you as the new superman, the new macho man.You come across as a sophisticated, voluble and charming guy in the tabloids.

B.R(pleased, has an idiotic grin): yeah...ha ha ha....um...heh heh...huh..huh...oop..heh heh

P.R(rolling his eyes): Beta, he is talking to you..

B.R (wakes up, suddenly starts reciting the lines he's memorised since morning): Yeah, it was damn cold during the shoot, and frightening stunts....(scratches his head)...and...and...the use of pyrotechnics in this film has been unsurpassed.

Host(bewildered): what are u talking about?

P.R (closing his eyes): Betaaa...shut up please.

B.R (looking hurt): Yes papaa.

Host (embarassed): Thank you so much for being on the show. After all the marketing and hype around this movie, im sure people would love to watch this movie. Hope its a grand success. Bye!!

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Haiku, Haiku..

What dreams may come?
This soul tears asunder from the constraints of thy frame
What dreams spake thus?
My Rationale seeks a departure from the tedium of reality
What dreams seeks thee?
That,Ambition desires a tryst with the horizon
What dreams shall i see?
Live a life beyond fate and me...

Saturday, June 10, 2006

Chandler Bing, Wherefore arst thou?


Man, he was a laugh-riot whenever he was on screen. Mathew Perry on Friends had the wittiest one-liners on the show. Here are some classic gems:

From the one with the jam
Joey: Why can't we have jam at our place?
Chandler: Because the kids need new shoes!!

From the one with a chick and a duck
(Ross and Rachel are talking out in the hall, Chandler comes out holding the duck)
Chandler: You stay out here and you think about what you did!!

From the one with the New Year’s Eve party

The time when Ross and Monica started geeking out over Dick Clark's Rockin' New Year's Eve and Rachel starting and laughing and explains to Chandler "I was with him (pointing to Ross) but now you're with her(pointing to Monica)!" And when Joey tells Ross and Mon they could be on the taping with him, they start getting excited:
Ross:"Oh my God!"
Monica:"Oh my God!"
Chandler:(realizing what he's now dealing with) "Oh MY God."

Others

Chandler: "Hey look, it's a monkey with a Ross on it's ass."

Monica: "And that's a shut-down!"
Joey & Chandler: "Shut-OUT!"

Chandler: "I'm smoking, I'm smoking, I'm smoking."
Phoebe: "I can't believe you, you've been so good for three years!"
Chandler: "And this is my reward!"

Rachel: Men can pee standing up!
Chandler: We can? Okay, I'm trying that

Chandler: "I'll show you to my room... That sounds so weird when it isn't followed by 'no thanks, it's late.'"

Rachel: "Tit for tat."
Chandler: "Well, I'm not showing you my tat."

Chandler: "hey Joey, i wrote a song today, it's called 'get up'"

Chandler: "You always assume you're going to find somebody. But what if I NEVER find anybody? Or even worse, what if I've already found the right woman but dumped her cause she pronounces it 'supposebly'?"

Chandler: "My whole life is a lesbian wedding."

Pheobe: "Oh my God,oh my God!You guys are not gonna believe this!I've just been discovered!"
Chandler: "Hey,now!I claimed you in the name of France four years ago!"

Chandler: "You know what, i can handle it; handle's my middle name. Actually, it's the uh, middle part of my first name."

Chandler [to the duck, while watching Baywatch]: "yes, i know what you're thinking and yes your breasts are just as firm and juicy."

Chandler [to Kathy]: "Do you want bow or stern?"
Kathy: "i really don't have a preference.you?"
Chandler: "i like it in the stern...of the boat."

Chandler [while stuck in the ATM vestibule with Jill Goodacre, voice-over]: "alright, just be cool, do something cool, blow a bubble that's boyish, impish.(spits out gum) good goin' imp."

Monica: Okay, everybody. Relax. This is not even a date. It's just two people going out to dinner and not having sex.
Chandler: Sounds like a date to me

Chandler : Janice was my safety net, ok? And now I have to get a snake.
Phoebe : Uh huh. Why is that?
Chandler : If I'm gonna be an old, lonely man, I'm gonna need a thing, you know, a hook, like that guy on the subway who eats his own face. So I figure I'll be Crazy Man with a Snake, y'know. Crazy Snake Man. And I'll get more snakes, call them my babies, kids will walk past my place, they will run. "Run away from Crazy Snake Man," they'll shout.

Chandler : My god, that's a big head! It didn't look this big in the office. Maybe it's the lighting. My head must look like a golf ball at work. All right, don't get hung up on it, quick, quick, list five things you like about her: Nice smile, good dresser...Big head, big head, big head!

Susie: Why do I want to put ice in my mouth and lick your body all over?
Chandler: Because I went to an all-boys high school and God is paying me back?

Ross : Do you think he'll be surprised to see me?
Chandler : Yes, at first. Then he'll realize he's a monkey, and isn't capable of that emotion.

Monica : "The camera adds ten pounds"
Chandler : "So how many cameras were actually on you?

Phoebe's boyfriend was coming out of his shorts....
Chandler : "What do we do, what do we do, what do we do??"
Ross : "Just don't look directly at it."
Chandler : "Like an eclipse."

Joey : Oh mommie, oh daddie, I am a big old baddie! Oh mommie, oh daddie, I am a big old baddie!
Ross : I guess he musta gotten the part in that play.
Monica and Phoebe : Oh.
Chandler: Yeah, either that, or Gloria Estefan was right, eventually, the rhythm is going to get you.

Phoebe: For your information, this happens to be a pain like no man will ever experience. Chandler: Yeah, well I don't think you can make that statement, unless you've been kicked in an area that God only meant to be treated nicely.

"I believe the foundation of our friendship was bad hair." - Chandler recalls his days in college with Ross

I know sitting in front of this computer is killing my brains and my sperm, but I get to make free long distance calls, so what the hell

Joey: "I may only have a couple drinks in me, but I love you man!"
Chandler: "I'm still on my first. I just think you're nice."

Chandler to Joey: "You know that thing where we talk to each other about things? Let's not do that anymore."

Buxom, Botox Babes on the waterfront


Single and comfortable enough not to mingle.... is that possible? And so I would like this blog entry to start. But i have a slight nagging doubt that this is what a typical Carrie Bradshaw entry would look like.

The popularity of the series continues to stupefy me (besides the obvious gratuitous in-your-face sex). Four over-the-hill laylas recounting their weekly sexcapades with witty puns and "cunnin'linguism" (sorry, couldn’t resist that one myself). They would have probably slept with all the guys in New York between them. Four potential mensa candidates dumbing themselves to get laid. Been reading some glowing reviews of the series, and some "pun"-dits (aren't i clever?) proclaiming a new era in women liberation (eeks!!). Wonder what they would say; if they had to review a series about four middle age guys discussing the latest women they've bedded every week? Would they find that amusing?

The series is a far cry from reality. Women past their menopause seldom look like a (foxy!!) Sarah Jessica Parker. Add some cellulite to the same beauties, and there you have it- Unattractive women, single and desperate for love (Not exactly female liberation). Maybe that is the reason; the season is fun to watch. Indulgent fantasies for women, and plenty of sex for the guys.

Ok, enough of the gripe factory. I have just finished watching season 1 & 2. Season 2 ends with Mr. Big (the redoubtable ass) getting engaged to a French student leaving behind a very pensive (embittered??) Carrie. I guess we wouldn’t be seeing him a lot in season 3. For those not following the series, Mr. Big is an ex who breaks up with her after citing commitment issues only to get engaged to the next. This is the typical unrequited love angles that lead actors in Sitcoms have to put up with. Their relationship is reminiscent of another famous couple in sitcom history- our own "Ross and Rachel" of Friends.
Mr. Big-Carrie is the only love interest that kept me hooked so far, besides the usual weirdo sessions of Samantha. It still is taking time to get around to Miranda's androgynous tendencies. Surely, the least interesting of the lot, or wait, that has to be Ms Goody Little Shoes whose name I yet cant recall.

On a parallel note, HBO is airing the final season with all new characters and storylines. Though I’m not sure how the season would end, I bet the writers are gonna make Mr. Big crawl on his feet and beg Carrie to marry him. That would be feminism at its prime-time best.

Meanwhile back to where this critique started from, “Single and comfortable not to mingle. Is that possible?” A resounding YES on that quarter; the past few weeks have been hectic and I’m starting to settle in the new job. But more than that, I have started to settle in this new state, and that is where you are thinking and taking time out only for yourself. Spent the last weekend with long-thought-lost college buddies. A trip to Philippines is in the offing. Hope that dream materializes soon enough. This seems like the start of an interesting phase in Tarun Sheshraj’s life. Hmmm…..Sex-y and (the) witty?!!! (I wish!)

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Corny movies with cornier dialogues!!!

Seen some good hindi movies in the recent past. It is nice to know the usual masala fare dished out is being served out in new exotic toppings. 'Gangster' and 'Ankahee' were two flashes in the pan. New faces, taut screenplays, beautiful music and 'bold' dialogues/scenes seem to be the new mantra.


But check out some corny dialogues from these "hep" movies:

Emraan Hashmee (to heroine in'Gangster'): Yes! Yes! I slept with you!! I did this for my country! Everytime i kissed you, caressed you it was for the lakhs of innocent souls terrorised in India!!!

(Way to go Hashmee baby!!! btw did u mean lakhs of souls terrorised by ur huffing and panting, face sucking antics???!!)

Aftab Shivadasani (to daughter in 'Ankahee'): Sorry baby, i was not a good father. I did not help u in maths, i did not eat maggi with you, i did not tell you stories, i did not.....(oh my god!!! enough already!!! )

Saturday, April 29, 2006

7/G Brindavan Colony


A.M Ratnam's done it.......he's successfully managed to expose me to a myriad emotions, successfully manipulate them and leave me utterly unsettled after the end of this 3 hour flick.

'7/G Brindavan Colony' aint your typical love story. Our hero aint the dreamboat of regular candy-floss and saccharine sweet settings. He is more in the genre of Quasimodo, pining for the woman that never could be his; with the underpinnings of unrequited love written all over.

The object of his affection, a stunning and totally convincing Sonia Agarwal is Ms. Goody Charms who can feel nothing but revulsion for the oddball of our hero, Ravi,who stays in the same housing colony. The ruffian grossly misunderstood and ostracised by the colony he stays in, our hero has learnt to fight failure with indifference and humiliation with aggression. His dad has given up on him, and the only loyalty he feels is for his wayward gaggle of friends. The obvious happens (to get the screenplay going!) and he falls for Sonia, who is disgusted by his antics and rebuffs him all along. Well, how he manages to get the heroine to like his sorry ass is what the movie about largely.

Love apparently can move mountains; it apparently prods our hero to trim his scraggly beard at the latter end of the movie! He does it all for her....turns a new leaf, gives up his ruffian ways, manages to get a job, make peace with his father, get a life...all for the bimbette who resides in 7/G, and she finally responds. But fate and a scriptwriter decide otherwise.

Turns out the girl is from another community which aint gonna let this have a happy ending. Her parents immediately shift base when they get whiff of the affair and start making preparations for her marriage with someone else.

They elope and stop at a hotel for the night. In what could truly be a pathbreaking moment in Indian cinema, Sonia and Ravi engage in a night of unbridled premarital passion. Well, that shouldnt be the pathbreaking moment, but rather the potrayal of the heroine. The traditionalists would be squirming with this potrayal of our 'indian' heroine. This one does not believe in fighting till the end for her love. Caught between her parents (Dad's got a tollywood heart, which has an attack every 2 reels) and the one man who could make her truly happy, she tries for a compromise. Not the ideal one perhaps, but maybe a more realistic one.

Turns out she plans the whole thing before hand including the encounter. It apparently is her way of showing her love, and the next day bids farewell to our hero. Ouch!!

The movie then ends with a very surprising and disturbing twist.

It just could have been another routine movie; but the taut screenplay, good songs and great acting makes for some real good viewing. There are a few hiccups in useless fight sequences though.

Our hero Ravi Shankar should be inducted into the great hall of fame of "L". He is one of the rare breed of actors who look convincing only in playing the loser. He joins my list of alltime filmi L's at the top with Tushaar Kapoor and Chandrachur Singh for company.

Sonia is simply superb.

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Eternal Sunshine of the spotless mind


Of late, i have developed the knack of finding movies i can relate to instantly (Or do they happen to find me?). Watched one such gem of a movie yesterday, and since this is the second day in a row where im bored out of my skull; my idle brain cant just get over the imagery and clever direction of this masterpiece.

How cool would that be? Having a machine that could erase the memories that keep haunting you. That would usher the end of heartbreak, guilt, pain of loss as we would know it. Thats what the peddler of instant bliss, Dr. Howard Mierzqwiak (Tom Wilkinson), a specialist in memory erasure, promises to embittered souls in this flick.

Joel Barish (Jim Carrey) is sad. He's broken up with his girlfriend, the uninhibited Clementine Kruczynski (Winslet) and is finding it tough to move on. His meek, unassuming personality finds it tough to meet other people and start over again. "How can i find another person, when i dont even have the courage to return the friendly stares of a curious onlooker?" is his lament. His ex is everything he is not. Bold, brash and selfish, they seem to complete each other and their relationship starts with a bang. Over a period of time, the very things that attract them to each other start to stifle.

Clementine starts to find Joel boring, while Joel on his part finds Clementine too loud and nagging. Things start getting bitter and they call it quits despite the love they feel. They just arent meant for each other.

This is when the old doc steps in. Joel wants a quick fix for his sadness, and he goes in for the treatment. What happens next is the highlight of the movie. The memory erasure starts and Joel starts a desperate attempt to save them. This is largely un-chronological and is interspersed by events flitting between the past and the future.

The poignancy of the character is beautifully played by Jim Carrey. Understated and never over the top, he's a treat to watch. Kate Winslet is pretty good in her part as well, with other competent performances from Kirsten Dunst and Elijah Wood.

Some scenes are particularly good; Jim Carrey's futile attempts at retrieving flotsam, His reflections at the beach house. This movie probably has a message; irrespective of the good and the bad memories, we learn to love the complete package.

Kate and Jim, though arent probably meant for each other are deeply in love with each other. Another interesting fact, is the patterns we keep following. Both of them, even after the operation hit it off immediately when they meet. Are we sometimes the victims of set patterns?

Bébés fatales: The Lion, the Angel and the Warbler

Name: Cutie Beauty a.k.a Amrutha
Age: 2.5 years
Height: 2 1'
Superpowers: Able to completely subjugate people at will (with just one twirl of her tiny hands). Ability to hypnotise with 'baby goo' talk. Has a genius vocabulary; can recite complicated phrases like "ssshhI sshloove shyou shhoo much!!".Can melt hearts with prolonged stares upto 5 seconds at a time.
Cuteness Factor: Very Strong
Weaknesses: Choclates, Dora "doll", Bob the builder

Name: Simba a.k.a Aravind
Age: 4
Height:2 5'
Superpowers: Nimble as a leopard, Can emit deafening screeches upto 150 dB. Can recite the same story about the Cookie Monster 321 times in a row (wow!) Can elicit gasps of "Oh! how cute" from women of every age. Exercises powers of persuasion with cogent arguments (mostly repeating the phrase "I WANT IT!!")
Chaalu Factor: Unbelievable
Weakness: Lion King, Coloring books, Spiderman, His favorite uncle (ahem! ahem!)

Name:"Nadia the fearless" a.k.a Arushi
Age: 1.5
Height: 1 8'
Superpowers: The naive one(or it seems), this angel is known for her brave demeanor, Ability to watch every soap imaginable on TV!! Prolific inventor of the "ba blah, cha cha" talk that include a complex combination of hand signals, cooing and smiles.
Bholu factor: Amazing
Weakness: Choclates, Tickling and her handsome (ahem! ahem!) uncle

Monday, March 27, 2006

Moving on....

And love
It's not the easy thing
The only baggage
That you can bring

Not the easy thing
The only baggage you can bring
Is all that you can't leave behind

And if the darkness is to keep us apart
And if the daylight feels like it's a long way off
And if your glass heart should crack
Before the second you turn back
Oh no, be strong

Walk on
Walk on
What you got, they can't steal it
No they can't even feel it

Walk on
Walk on
Stay safe tonight
You're packing a suitcase for a place
None of us has been
A place that has to be believed
To be seen
You could have flown away
A singing bird
In an open cage
Who will only fly
Only fly for freedom
Walk on
Walk on

What you got
You can't deny it
Can't sell it or buy it
Walk on
Walk on

You stay safe tonight
And I know it aches
How your heart it breaks
You can only take so much
Walk on
Walk on


Hard to know what it is
If you never had one

I can't say where it is
But I know I'm going

That's where the heart is
And I know it aches
And your heart it breaks
You can only take so much
Walk on

Leave it behind
You've got to leave it behind
All that you fashion
All that you make
All that you build
All that you break
All that you measure
All that you feel
All this you can leave behind
All that you reason
All that you care
It's only time
And I'll never fill up all my mind
All that you sense
All that you scheme
All you dress up
And all that you see
All you create
All that you wreck
All that you hate

Thursday, March 09, 2006

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

"The Other Half" - Teaser

"Gawd!! He does have style...i do think he might like you!" she continued in her drawling tone.
"I mean, anyone who can write such a beautiful proposal about you, must think about you a lot.Waise bhi, i heard he wrote it impromptu...that sure as hell seems he definitely likes you!!!......" said Sumi as she kept twirling the rose in her hand.
I was enjoying this talk with my roomie, more so as it was about me....even more so that the topic of discussion was the object of our affection-Vinay.The third month of college and things were already turning interesting beyond my imagination. I was far away from home after much persuasion and much stolid farewells from my dad. The first time i attended a co-ed, the first time i ever had a guy writing poems to me at my fresher party....and the first time i was getting swept away by someone so good looking.
"...Hey! that need not mean that he loves you,yaar...he could just be good at this kind of thing...He is chaalu!" chipped in Rohini the wise one. She was elder to us and was pursuing her postgraduation. Pretty, sophisticated and rich..she had attitude. From men to mascara, sex to salvation, flirting to fashion tips..she had all the answers. She was our men's woman; the Oracle from rohtak.

Vinay was the archetypal bad boy, but he had attitude. He was smart and what was more, he didnt hesitate to show that to anyone, who tried to prove him otherwise. The smartest of the lot- poet, dancer,singer, studious,athelete, funny, babe magnet and a pompous prick to the rest of the guys. If he wasnt running out of scrapes, he would wait for his next hapless victim to open his mouth,

Monday, January 09, 2006

Gunny Bag (A Short story) - Part I

They say an impending sign of doom is a sudden rush of adrenaline felt while staring at an oncoming car 3 seconds before impact. Did somebody say that, or did yours truly (P.I.Ganesh to the uninitiated) make it up while bracing himself for the collision?

"Son of a Pig!!? Got a death wish?" bellowed the Uncle, putting his head out of the gray santro. It finally screeched to a halt, inches from Gunny's (Others just called him P.I.G) shaking' legs. Cheeks flushing beetroot red, and growing increasingly aware of the growing crowd, he made a hasty depart from the scene of the crime. "Man! What was I thinking?” said Gunny his feeling of embarrassment growing. It was one thing to be involved in a humiliating scene, quite another to be on the losing side. He never would have heard the Santro's horn if it weren’t for the sudden gasps of shocks, that curious onlookers sometime are known to emit. For an eleven year old, such absent-mindedness could be construed as irregular, if not unhealthy. But Gunny had a lot on his mind; His world was tumbling around him.

"Harish is gonna laugh his head off if he heard about this", thought Gunny with a pensive frown that made a sharp vertical frown between his eyebrows. He imagined Harry and his gang of dumb overgrown chamchas clutching their stomachs and doubling over at the whole incident. Ouch! That image made him cringe a little bit more uncomfortably. He kept walking in a gloomy silence, all the while keeping watch for Harry and his cronies and further mishaps. He had had his share for today. He really didn’t know where he was going and he didn’t care. He had seen his mother administered to her daily dose of beating by his father; today’s being a little more than usual. Her cries were unusually loud today, causing some of the neighbors to intervene. His house was swarming with people now; some shouting at his father to stop it while Madhu Aunty and Pamela Aunty were consoling his mother. PIG found it hard to stay a moment long; Having to listen to the spat was bad enough, he would rather be caught dead than listen to Madhu Aunty’s sympathetic remarks about life being difficult to a 11 year old.

Of course, life was difficult…need he get that from somebody who made it a point to ask him embarrassing questions about his parents, every time he encountered her outside. Arms of layered fat, like fresh dough mixed with water with the colour to match; she would make it a point to attack his thin cheeks with her built-to-perfection red, razor sharp nails. Her face reminded him of a large balloon, with appropriate orifices depicted on them. Gunny always had the suspicion that she was trying her best to be kind to him. She would always make it a point to call him aside, while he would be their house to play with Ginny. Over a period of time, he had started getting wary of going over to their place. Even Ginny’s pet Labrador failed to break his resolve to come over. Amma’s recent statement over Madhu Aunty’s bindi, when her husband was supposed to be dead somehow strengthened his decision (which he could never quite explain clearly) never to meet her.

After today’s spat, his resolve was further snowballed to an ardent vow to incommunicado.
“I don’t really see why she has to show kindness to me in the first place; I hate that beemb-oh!” thought Gunny to himself, quite pleased with the effect the sentence was making to soothe him. “Beem-boh!” he muttered to himself, this time a bit loudly. He had learnt the word a few weeks back from the very studious Ginny, who would explain the meaning later as a stupid woman. Ironical that he was using the same word about her mother.

He had neared the beach now, at least 2 kilometers from his home. The pavement on the beach road was a busy sight as usual. Hawkers of puffed rice, Balloon sellers, Beggars in tatters, Married couples across the benches, Young adolescent romeos, large families with wailing babies in tow, a typical Sunday evening.

Gunny though was lost in his own thoughts. The increasing crowds hardly fazed him, used as he was to this scene. His posture would remind someone of a grownup; Hands in pockets and the saddest kid to ever wear a Mickey Mouse cap his thoughts were slightly distracted by a group of kids of his age chattering away in abandon. Hands dug deeper into his pockets with his shoulders raised, he suddenly felt lonely. It reminded him of Harry and his goonies.

He still remembered the first time, he encountered this pack of monkeys. He and Ginny along with her pet lab, Monty had gone to the park to try out his new bicycle. Harry, his sister (the fat one) and the local gang were playing cricket and spotted them. Harry sister Lalitha was Gunny’s classmate and though they had never talked till that point, she made the first effort to involve him and Ginny into their “Gang”. Harry, the tallest among them and the clear leader by virtue of his being able to beat up anyone else was cool towards them. The first meeting, he hardly spoke to them directly and was occupied by his cronies. After the first few days, he however started taking an interest in Gunny or rather his bicycle. He offered gunny to teach him, which usually involved Gunny standing in the center of the park while Harry would have his rounds across the park all the while shouting to him about his technique. Gunny would take in the scene with equanimity, all the while thinking the best of Harry. He did not want to displease the only interesting friend he had ever met. It didn’t take long for him to join that esteemed gang of cronies, following Harry wherever he went and doing whatever he wanted. That was the only time; he had felt happiness in his ephemeral existence. Going to the park daily at 4 PM after school, meeting up with the gang and sharing tall tales about their dad’s jobs (Gunny’s was always the wildest), shared anecdotes of their teachers, Harry’s latest gadgets and played till their mothers beckoned them back.

He would have preferred it to stay that way forever, if there weren’t a couple of incidents that broke his idyll. Harry never liked the mousy looking Ginny, and her pet. She was Gunny’s neighbor and his constant companion since the beginning. It was inevitable that her entry into Harry’s gang was by large only due to Gunny. The tiny, bespectacled figure who seldom spoke a word to anyone else but Ginny would make her presence in the gang with long sullen silences, stroking the nape of Monty during their daily meetings. Harry despised her and made no bones to hide the fact with his jeering remarks about ‘Onkari Moothi’ (Scowling face) as he called her regularly. Ginny, on her part bore these remarks and if she was hurt never showed it. Gunny, would watch with wariness the growing acrimony from Harry. For his own part, he was starting to find Ginny embarrassing and a misfit in the group (somebody totally unlike him). He would slowly distance himself from Ginny, and would soon forget to call Ginny to play whenever he left from home. Harry’s disapproval only hastened the ‘rejection’ procedure of Ginny and he slowly started becoming a interested spectator of Ginny’s daily humiliation.

The day would have been quite uneventful like any other, if emotions had not found their appropriate escalation points. Gunny had rushed to the ground a little late, without bothering to call Ginny. His mother had insisted on him finishing his homework first and it was nearly 5:30 PM. He reached the ground to find a uneasy act being played. Ginny was crying, her pale face red and shouting at Harry and his gang. Harry was throwing stones at Monty, which was keeping its respectful distance and barking wildly. It couldn’t get closer to Ginny; who was trying unsuccessfully to stop the proceedings. It took him a couple of minutes for Gunny to stop the madness, with Ginny running away leaving a smug Harry behind. Gunny knew from that instant, all his friends were gone.

From that day, Ginny stopped talking to him and stopped stepping out of home to play. Harry for his part included Gunny to his ‘disapproving’ list. They started ignoring him, when he tried to join them at their regular haunt. They started making the same scathing remarks which Ginny had been subject to previously. It all had been a month ago, and they weren’t in a forgiving mood since then.

END OF PART I

Thursday, January 05, 2006

We didnt start the fire......

Gunfire at IISc, Slaps at Meerut, Gangrape on Pushpak Express, Sensex at 9600, Phone Taps at CMs residence, Video Tape Scandals, Mergers and Acquisitions, Cold Waves in North India, Railways on Strike,ISRO on top,"Vivek-Ash breakup", "Aamir-Kiran" nuptials, The "Ganguly" spoofs, That "Dravid" rules, "King Kong" roars, Volkswagen-AP blues, Airlines price wars, Battle for soundbytes, Reality Shows 'Qazi', 'Abhijit Sawant' limps, Fatwas on Sania, $10 billion investments in Bharat, 'Kajra Re' rocks, Limp promises of Musharraf,Floods in Tamil Nadu, Tsunami Anniversaries and a...............................................Happy New Year 2006!

Bad Ass Diaries


So she said "Tarun, my man! why do u splatter your deeds over a public blog where everyone can read your misfortunes? Why make a spectacle of yourself?"

Well, my cool reply was " Uh-Duh...ummm... i dont think its a spectacle... u think so? ..duh...umm...uhhh".

A two week hiatus before i actually blog and post a "cooler" reply to that one....

"Im bad (roar!)......I spread myself for plain defilement for whoever might feel like doing so.... I crave the debasement.... Im cheap.... "embarass" is my middle name"

OK, that wasnt so cool.....